Saturday august 18: a bad day

Yes, there are those as well...

I had to give a first jump course today, not my favourite activity, but hey, I 've survived worse. 8 students, all of an acceptable level of fitness and brains, so no problem there. I even have an apprentice instructor, to help me! After an early start, I 'm done with it around 4 p.m. so finally I can start jumping. I team up with Gert, we start off with a level one, a 50 year old man, remarkably sharp and fit for someone his age. He makes a good exit, I have to help him quite a bit to find the pull during his practice pulls, but he makes a great jump, until...

5500ft, he signals, pulls, and then HOLDS ON TO THE PC!!! I fuck up big time here: he makes the pull, and I let go too soon, before he throws it away. In the 2 seconds it takes me to fly back in place, Gert reaches over the student's back, and starts pulling the bridle. :-(( Luckily, at that moment, the student lets go of the PC, before any real shit happens. Big sigh of releave, fuck, fuck, fuck, no good... Some reflecting and talking to do when we are back on the ground.

I was trained as an AFF instructor back in the ripcord days, when a primary's job was to secure the pull and then back off, to create as little turbulence as possible for the spring to take of. On a PC system, I have to secure the pull AND THE THROW, before I let go! Of course I know this, but fact is I didn't do it: I did as I was trained years ago. I wasn't alert enough, I was flying too much on auto-pilot and apparently I never made the mental switch to the new procedure completely. Well, I talked about it with a few people afterwards, I'm sure it won't happen again, and extra beer this evening for being lucky on a wake-up call. Also a talk with Gert: I made the original mistake, but his reaction was dangerous to himself, and to the student (horseshoe). By the way, when the student came down, first thing he said was "I think I held on to that little thing a bit to long, no?" I agreed and we high fived.

Next jump is a girl, a first jumper from my course that morning. She is nervous, makes a good jump from 13.000 ft till 50 ft, but then she flares much too high. She holds the toggles down, the canopy doesn't stall, but instead of holding her feet together, she reaches for the ground. She doesn't roll but tries to stand it up, and she is unlucky: she brakes her leg. Fuck, fuck, fuck, no good again. I know this one isn't directly on my conto, I know shit happens, and all that stuff, but of course I wonder what I could have said or done different, how I could have prevented this. She made the mistakes, but I feel like it is my reponsibility...

While she is taken away to hospital, I go up again, with a group of 10, to celebrate the 100th jump of a girl I trained last year. I really like that girl, and we make a very good jump, all the others are thrilled, but I can't enjoy it as much as I usually do on such occasions.

Sunset, I feel I deserve a few beers after a day like this, but the nagging feeling doesn't go away...